Where's this poem then?

[mme_depompadour]

The Doctor claims to have written me a poem. I have yet to hear it, but I'm sure it's lovely.

He found Jack in Mexico, but no Fred *cries*.
The Doctor says we do not need a spare Fred, which is unfortunate, seeing as I appear to be incubating one. Will go off in search of backstreet abortion today. Maybe Jack knows someone, he's bound to have dealt with unwanted children before.

I painted the nursery beige and pink. I still need to do the curtains and the bedding and we need to get lots of bits and bobs. I think I will talk to Penelope Maybe she will throw us a baby shower? If I don't tell her about the backstreet abortion of course.

I'm still horny. Must find Jack.

Comments

[miss-gate.livejournal.com]

Excusez-moi? Extremely willing foster mother here?

[mme_depompadour]

I do beg your pardon, madam, but I was under the impression you weren't particularly fond of me. And apart from anything else, you have managed to steal my first baby from me who has yet to be found. I don't think these are the sorts of qualities I am looking for in a potential foster mother.

Besides, I do not trust your intentions. I believe you are sadly trying to make up for the terrible mistakes you made with your half-alien hybrid-child thing, mistakes which have turned him into the slutty, confused, hubristic, self-loathing, oedipal and angry man alien Time Lord man he is today. Now why, pray tell, would I have any reason to prefer your foster mothering offer over a backstreet abortion?

I don't think the Doctor wants another baby. I just want to make him happy. *sobs*

[miss-gate.livejournal.com]

Madame - as I am apparently on my deathbed, I appeal to you, not as a rival or an enemy but as a woman. It may well be better for this child if it never sees the light of day; but do not do this terrible thing to yourself. If you must procure a miscarriage, procure a safe and cleanly one.

[lonely-god.livejournal.com]

I have indeed written you a poem.

Oh, Reinette
I make you wet
In personal places
And you make funny faces
When we have hot sex
And you steam up my specs
When you undress
And when you caress
My thing for which there is no rhyming euphemism.


Do you like it? Is it romantic enough?

[mme_depompadour]

*fans self*

That's just lovely, my weirdo alien love.

*goes quite moist*

[lonely-god.livejournal.com]

It took me hours. Well, I say hours. More like minutes. But long minutes. Long, hard minutes.

[mme_depompadour]

So often the way with you, isn't it, my sweet?

I love your long, hard minutes, really

*kiss*

[lonely-god.livejournal.com]

Those are hours, my love.

[mme_depompadour]

Are you absolutely sure, oh Lord of Time? They go by awfully quickly.

[lonely-god.livejournal.com]

WHAT THE SHIT?